Heart Breaker

Adriana is starting to push her limits with me. She knows the boundaries, but she just wants to see if I'll let her get by with acting up or not. Lately, it seems, all I have been doing is telling her to stop or swatting her thigh to get her attention. Now, Adriana is a very tender hearted child (I am told, I was the same way) and so her feelings get hurt pretty easily. Not so much when I get onto her about something, but if Ryan or anyone else does, it really hurts her feelings. I would have to say, I have always thought of myself as a tough cookie, as far as children go. I could never understand why parents give into their child, when they would cry or get upset. "Suck it up you baby" is what I would think, and I would be even more upset at the parents who would give in. Well, that has all changed now that I'm a parent and discipline is a part of our daily routine. Adriana's new thing is, is if I or Ryan get onto her, she will cover her eyes to hide. All you can see is her little bottom lip beginning to quiver and she will remover her hands just for a brief second to see if she is still in trouble and all I see are those big blue eyes, red and full of tears. It breaks my heart! As much as I want to scoop her up and tell her I'm sorry for getting onto her, I can't, and I hate that! I have to stick to my guns so she will learn a lesson, but boy, is it ever hard! Last night, she kept putting her leg up on the table while we were eating dinner, and I kept asking her to put it down. Well, she knew she wasn't suppose to have it up there to begin with and she would keep putting it up there and then looking at me and smiling. I gave her plenty of warnings and told her if she did it again, she was going to get a swat and sit in time out. Well, surprise, surprise, she did it again, just to see how I would react. I got her out of her seat, swatted her behind and sat her on the floor. If looks could do anything at all, it think it would have shattered my heart. I almost want to cry thinking of it. She looked so sad, with a big pouty lip, red, teary eyes, she just looked up at me, as if to say, "Mama, you hurt my feelings so much". I just wanted to scoop her up and love on her, but she needed to learn her lesson. I think last night was the saddest look I have ever seen on her. And the thing is, she's still at an innocent age, where if she cries and gets upset, its genuine and not a show. I know I have to stay strong and teach her right from wrong, but its killing me!